Mid 20s Crisis

I feel so old. I am only 24 and I feel like I should be planning my funeral. This country makes you feel so old so fast. I think it’s because people keep accomplishing things younger and younger. The ideal timeline is to:

  • Graduate high school at 18
  • Graduate college at 22
  • Find a lifelong job by 24
  • Be married by 25
  • Have the first baby by 26
  • Buy your first house by 28
  • And so on…

Age is the number one measurement that people use towards success. I am guilty of this with my 14 month old son. He was early with everything, so I thought that he is better than most babies (well he is but that’s another post 😉 ). He started crawling by 5 months and started walking by 8 months, which is crazy early for babies to acquire these skills. As much as I would like to believe that this means his whole life is going to be successful, it doesn’t. It definitely is a good start to his legacy but there are so many turns that he may take.

I always wanted to be a professional singer, and I feel like my time has passed for that to happen. Though seeing winners of these past singing competitions of people in their 40s does give me hope, the reality of it is that most singers usually are discovered at such a young age. I get so discouraged when I see talent agencies putting an age limit on who they are looking for. Ages 12-18 only to apply, well who is to say that a 19 year old doesn’t have what they are looking for?

I love hearing stories of people over 50 going back for their degree or even graduating high school! It is so inspiring, I wish that we wouldn’t put such importance on our age, and instead focus on the good that we have done with whatever time that has been placed in front of us no matter how old. It’s very hard to not fall into that trap too, at every turn I feel like there are questions about how much we have accomplished with the time that we have had. Especially at family and high school reunions. That’s what high school reunions are for now, is to see how your other classmates are doing and what they have done with the past 10 years of their life and who was the most successful.(Have you ever seen Romy and Michele’s high school reunion? They faked their success to gain approval of their peers that they haven’t seen for 10 years.) But who is to determine the success? Sure Timothy Whoever is CEO of a billion dollar company but still cannot get the approval of his parents. Or Susan whoever was married right out of high school, has 4 kids but dreams of traveling alone.

I say to each their own journey. Put one foot in front of the other and forget the horizon, let it give you hope of a beautiful future but focus on today. And forget all those haters who are saying that you should have done more with your time. They aren’t satisfied either with what they have done if they are judging you; because, a happy-content person does not judge, they love.

I have to remind myself of my youth often, there is much that I hope to acquire in this short life. I get discouraged that I have wasted time, but as long as I am on this road to zenith (see what I did there?) there is no wasted time but time gained of getting to where I need to be. I wish to have 3-4 kids and I would like to have them all by the age of 30, but I have accepted that this probably won’t happen. My husband and I have a lot of schooling to get done first. I would rather secure the future for the son I have now then to risk it by having more kids too soon. I also want a house so badly, we are living in our 4th apartment and many of our friends and family are settling down into permanent residencies. Yet again, I have to remind myself that that is their path and I am on my own path. What would it matter to own a house before you are 30 or after 30? I believe that as long as you are closing in on your goals, that it doesn’t matter when you reach them, just that you do reach them.

I hope that you are encouraged through this post and will stop comparing yourself to others around you that have something that you do not have yet, your time will come. Prepare yourself in the meantime, become the best person that you can be. So when your time comes you will be completely ready without a doubt, enjoy your weekend 🙂

Thank you for reading! Criticism, praise, suggestion, thoughts, questions, please leave them with me 🙂

 

9 thoughts on “Mid 20s Crisis

  1. I have this friend that constantly compares herself to me and it drives me up the waaaalllll o_O. it so bad that she talks her self off the legend by insulting me to my face. oh dessi I can’t have kids because i can bare handle the animals I have now….uh thanks for deducing my kids to cats… I feel like interjection is a waste of time cause she just doesn’t get it, if I send her this post you wrote she still wouldn’t get it and would probably insult my finding time to read…anyways great post, it seems you’ve got the greater picture. once you get it you kinda just got it. whatever “it” is I stopped comparing my journey to other people’s journey when I was 14. loosing a parent puts crap like that in perspective fairly quickly. you rock brittney, I only get to back read like twice a month, but I make sure you stay list, go conquer the world girl!

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    • Thank you so much Dessi for all of your love and support! Are you sure you want this person as a friend?? That relationship sounds toxic. I have also had my experiences of people comparing themselves to me, I used to let it bother me but I don’t anymore. I just turn the other cheek and ignore it. Not worth my time to pay attention to it. I have too much work to do and too many dreams to achieve 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      • yes ma’am too many dreams to achieve! you are very welcome and very deserving. ummmmmnnnn that person as a friend being toxic…eh …I will agree. how to cut the ties after 17 years….that’s the hard part. caring for someone from a distance maybe? we do plan on moving…I dunno girl I don’t no…

        Liked by 1 person

      • yes ma’am too many dreams to achieve! you are very welcome and very deserving. ummmmmnnnn that person as a friend being toxic…eh …I will agree. how to cut the ties after 17 years….that’s the hard part. caring for someone from a distance maybe? we do plan on moving…I dunno girl, I just don’t no… lol

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  2. I love that you touched on this subject! I think I have a mini crisis around every birthday, and I recently plucked what I think was a grey hair! Let me tell you how depressing that was. I’m 27 now, in the process of buying a “fixer upper” house with my boyfriend. .who is older than me and scared to have the marriage/children conversation as ALS seems to be running in his family. My mother tells me every time she sees me, that if I’m planning on having kids, I need to hurry up because the clock is ticking and I’m running or of time. That’s a scary thing to hear. I want kids more than most other things in this world, but I’m not ready for it yet. Will I be ready before my time is out. This getting old stuff is scary, and grown up realities can make decisions very difficult to make.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I hear you! I think the exact same way. I already have a one year old but I want a couple more and I know that it’s still going to be a few years before we are done with school and financially set to have another one. I really don’t want to go past the age of 30 to have kids I just think it gets too medically risky and a lot harder to gain your body back after that. So glad to hear that you bought a house that’s awesome! And I’m so jealous haha. The pressure from family and in-laws is insane when it comes to getting married and having kids. It will all play out for you. 🙂 Thanks for reading!

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